I do not know who needs to read this but now is the time to let go.
The truth is, not all relationships are meant to last forever. Some are supposed to end. Like those where there is abuse or where you are doing all the work. Or the ones where people change, they grow apart, outgrow each other. Their needs change, they begin wanting different things from life and that is okay. The end of a relationship only becomes a failure if you did not learn anything from that relationship. If you come out of it the same way you went in.
As part of my wellness journey, I sought to create healthy genuine relationships and in this post, I share the types of toxic people who may come into your life, that you may need to let go of.
By the way, this is a shame-free zone. It isn’t about judging but healing and learning. It is about assessing ourselves and those close to us, the individuals we allow to have our time.
THE CRITIC
Have you ever been in a relationship in which you feel judged and criticized no matter what you do? You go along with anything they want to make them happy and you likable. You are compliant, you are not living in your own terms to please them and they never appreciate or notice your efforts but will always find an opportunity to criticize you when you do not fulfill their slightest of demands.
Let go.
Keep in mind that criticism is different from advice, and it is important to understand the difference.The critic criticizes the person instead of the behavior.
THE GOSSIP
Watch out for those people who deliberately tear other people down. One day, they will tear you down too.
"Great minds discuss ideas, average ones discuss events, and small minds discuss people." – Eleanor Roosevelt
CONVERSATION NARCISSIST
Have you ever been talking to someone who keeps interrupting you? Conversational narcissists love to talk about themselves—or just hear themselves talk. They don’t ask you any questions, they don’t wait for your responses and they won’t shut up. In a relationship, these people will end up being completely self-centered and never be attentive to your needs.
THE STONEWALL-ER (ghosting)
Stonewalling refers to the act of refusing to communicate to evade the issue and the stonewall-er is a person who refuses to engage in conversation or share feelings when important issues come up.
Additionally, it can cause you to harbor feelings of resentment and guilt. If you are trying to communicate with a person you know well and he or she refuses to be honest and open with you, you may want to reconsider why you are in that relationship in the first place.
THE JEALOUS AND JUDGMENTAL
Jealousy is an incredibly toxic part of the human experience because it comes from so much internal self-hate that you can’t be happy for anyone around you.
The grass is always greener somewhere else. Even when something great happens to a jealous person, they don’t derive any satisfaction from it because they measure their fortune against the world’s when they should be deriving their satisfaction from within.
We all get jealous but dwelling is what grows it to toxic levels. Recognize the feeling, compliment the person and then let it go.
THE STUBBORN ONE WHO INSIST YOU SHOULD BE SOMEONE ELSE
Unfortunately, family and old friends often fail to recognize how we have change and grown over the years.
Sometimes its based on who you used to be but sometimes its based on their perception of you.
It can be easy to conform to these labels because you remember when they were true but in the long run its always better to be disrespected for who you are rather than who you are not.
The different relationships you encounter are supposed to grow you in different ways. Some teach you the things you do not want in a relationship again.Some teach you new skills, some teach you about yourself and grow you. Some teach you to let your hair down or how to gracefully let go of things.
All the best.
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